Being a parent or caregiver is one of the most meaningful, selfless roles a person can take on. It’s also one of the most demanding. This is true of all parents, but those caring for children with autism or other special needs have a higher level of demands that can feel all-encompassing. When it feels like caregiving demands are never-ending, it can be very easy to put your own self-care on the back-burner. While this is understandable, it’s important to understand the negative aspects of neglecting yourself. Burnout not only impacts you as the caregiver, but can directly affect the quality of care you’re providing. By following simple, practical self-care tips, you can prioritize your own mental health to enable yourself to be fully present for those you’re caring for.
How Ignoring Self-Care Impacts Caregivers
When caring for a child with autism, it may feel like you’re always “on.” Juggling life’s responsibilities while navigating unique emotional challenges, ignoring self-care can lead to:
Burnout: Burnout happens when you’ve allowed your physical, emotional and mental exhaustion to go too far for too long, eventually making it difficult to give the best care to those who need it.
Emotional Strain: Without the right support, caregivers can eventually feel isolated, overwhelmed and sometimes even resentful of their situation.
Poor Health: Poor mental and emotional health can lead to poor physical health, too. Chronic stress and fatigue weakens the immune system, making you more susceptible to illness. Not only that, but ongoing health conditions may be pushed down your priority list, causing complications or worsening health.
Instead of allowing yourself to get to the point of burnout or isolation, start incorporating some simple self-care tips into your life to help ease the heavy load you carry.
Self-Care Tips For Caregivers
Start Small: When you’re trying to make a life change, it’s easy to want to go big or go home, but sometimes that’s not a realistic approach to longterm change. Find ways to incorporate small moments of self-care into your day-to-day life that will be easy to maintain moving forward. Some examples:
Start your morning solo by waking up 5-10 minutes earlier to enjoy a quiet cup of tea or coffee before the day begins.
Bring joy to household tasks by making a playlist of your favorite songs or podcasts that will make the mundane more enjoyable. Folding laundry may become a less a chore and more a place of solace if you start to correlate it with time to relax and tune in to your favorite tunes or stories.
Practice deep breathing or mindfulness techniques to bring yourself to the present moment and feel more in tune with your body and mind. Apps like Calm or Headspace can make this easier.
Build Support: Everyone needs a good support system! Build a trusted group of friends, family, professionals or other caregivers that you’re able to connect with. This can be in person, on the phone or even online. There are many groups available to join online specifically for parents or caregivers of autistic children that can help provide a sense of camaraderie, especially if you don’t know many in your situation in real life. If your family is not already accessing services like ABA Therapy, utilizing resources like this can be very helpful. Not only does ABA therapy help your child, it can help your entire family streamline routines to be more conducive to a life with autism. Additionally, they can offer resources or networking opportunities to meet more people to relate with. For example, Bloom Behavioral Healthcare hosts quarterly community events aimed at introducing families with neurodivergent kids with the hope of connecting people to a larger network of individuals in similar circumstances.
Set Boundaries: It can sometimes seem like life is coming at you from all sides, between family, professional life, personal life and more. Learn that it’s okay to say no to extra requests that overextend you or take up precious time. Delegate tasks when necessary and possible to free up your schedule. If you can, limit your availability to allow for specific, non-negotiable time to bet set aside for rest or personal hobbies.
Prioritize Physical Health: Mental health and physical health are inexplicably intertwined. Make time each day to move your body - even just a short walk around the block - while also making healthy diet choices, drinking plenty of water and prioritizing a healthy sleep routine.
Schedule Breaks: If possible, coordinate with a trusted friend, family member or respite service to organize scheduled breaks. It’s important to have time to cultivate personal hobbies, rest, spend time with your partner or friends, and so on. This may look different for you than it does for others - maybe instead of a Friday night on the town, you’re heading out for a Tuesday afternoon matinee - but that’s okay. Being able to take a break away from caregiving duties allows you to come back to them with a renewed sense of patience and perspective.
Celebrate Wins: Remind yourself of the good you’re doing, and the good you’re child is doing. Keep a gratitude journey - even if it’s a list in your phone notes - to keep track of milestone moments, happy memories, and positive highlights. When you focus on gratitude, it helps reframe the challenging moments, too.
Let Go of Excuses: Parents and caregivers have no shortage of reasons why they can’t prioritize themselves. It feels like there’s no time, they don’t know where to start, or there’s an immense amount of guilt that comes along with self-care. Let’s work on reframing that narrative. Self-care is an integral part of caregiving - when you’re not your best, you can’t be your best for the one you’re caring for either. Even five minutes a day of intentional care or rest can make a world of different in how you feel and show up for others. Start small and build from there. You can do it!
Being a parent or caregiver is a journey - one filled with love, challenges, growth and adventure. Focusing on your child’s needs is natural and imperative - but so is your own wellbeing. We encourage you to embrace self-care in this upcoming year, focusing in how you can show up for yourself so you can continue to effectively show up for those you care for. As with anything, small steps lead to big bounds, and eventually you’ll notice a positive change in all aspects of life.
If your family is in need of ABA therapy to help your child and family manage life with autism more efficiently, please contact Bloom Behavioral Healthcare to learn how we can help! In the meantime, the time to take care of yourself begins now!
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